Sunday, 15 May 2016

You Left Without A Word

Gone. Lost. I don't know for how long.

I know we weren't very good together. But haven't you put up with me since day one in school? With you, everything was so much easier. We'd climb mountains together, and reach such great heights! And my friends'd look at us in awe, slightly jealous for not having you for themselves.

Yet after all that we've been through together, you chose to elude me now. Now when I need you the most. For ten years you stood by me, never once was there a betrayal. Maybe that's why I took you for granted. But don't think I hadn't noticed our relationship dwindle in the past two years. Don't think I didn't see the distance   creep in between us. I tried to ignore it, but it was too obvious not to notice. You were around, but never quite with me. Is it because I've spent too much time with those others you don't agree with? Or is it because I never appreciated you much all along?

I hadn't known then that you would disappear so soon. And now it frightens me to think of my years ahead without you. I've been searching high and low for you, hoping you're somewhere around the corner and only just playing games with me. I waited for you to pop out of the blue and exclaim that you'd never left, that you were only fooling around with me, that you would always be by my side. But you never came. 

Two hours. That's how long I've been sitting before my books. Four days. That's how long I have left to study for the exam. My mom's noticed your absence too, though she did not bring it up with me until now in fear of disappointing me. I've tried to convince her that you'd be back soon, that everything would be fine, and secretly wished  my words were true. 

Where are you? These fat books around are scaring me. The chalk white pages are blinding, the letters hard to decipher. Everyone is beginning to notice your departure, and they're taking advantage of it. They're calling out to me right now...that Jane Austen book on the table, the Rubiks cube left undone, the piano badly missing my fingers, and even the plain wall that's made itself interesting, only for me. And yet you don't show up. 
My interest to study. 

Gone. Lost. And I don't know for how long.

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#This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

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