To Love

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"So?" 

I ask him, feigning impatience. Inside me is a racing heart ready to burst at any moment. I wonder if it's my excitement or just the fear of getting caught by the PT teacher.

"You know what I'm going to say." he says. I almost roll my eyes. 

"Are you going to say something or not?" 

He shuffles his feet awkwardly, unsure what to do in this situation. We're at the corner of the playground, trying to be discreet in the middle of noise and hustle. 

"Okay." he says, breaking into a grin. "I love you."

In the name of happiness

Dear happiness,

Back when we were kids, we didn't think much about you. You were around most of the time, so we took you for granted. It was during teenage that you started playing peekaboo. We were only beginning to meet your counterparts. The blood-boiling rage, the envy, the clouds of frustration, the yearning, and the blend of it all that we couldn't put a name to. We did manage to hunt you down in the midst of the mess. It was still possible. But now I'm twenty-one, and you've conveniently settled in a land I am unable to step on.

More than just a Mom

Source: yadi.sk

The five textbooks stacked up on my desk sat waiting. Waiting for me to find the motivation to open at least one. I would've done it after all, if mom hadn't called for lunch that very moment. And I knew better than to ignore mom's call.

Seated at the dining table, the guilt wouldn't leave me. So with each handful of rice and fish curry, I built on the study schedule to be followed in my mind. The silence over lunch went unnoticed until my mom broke it.

What it Means to be Free

Source: bigstockphoto

"But we don't need to listen to others. Only you girls need to."

He joked when I asked him to get up. Except that it wasn't really a joke.

.

.

Dear old patriarchy,

You've probably existed since the beginning of time.

You've helped countless men to reach great heights.

You've tricked the world into keeping you close

Rather than keeping up with these 'equal rights'.

Some Things Dreamy

Source: Shutterstock

A laptop, earphones, books, and pens. Strewn across the bed were these and a nineteen-year-old mess dozing over them. A typical day during college. My roommate is typing away frantically in her phone as if she were fixing third world problems. It's past midnight, so she decides to take a break and clean up my bed for me (what did I do to deserve her!).

Partly awake, this nineteen-year-old mess gets up to help as well. I'm only five minutes away from flopping back into a sound sleep when the phone rings. Unknown number.

"Hello?"

"Hello. Is this Dashy?"

Deep male voice. Aww man, was there some urgent club work at this hour?

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. So I was just going through your blog and wanted to tell you that I really like it."

Silence. Wait, what?

The Double Surprise

August 7, 2017
11:55 pm

Five minutes to midnight. No whispers or murmurs outside the door. My roommate is staring at her laptop screen, disregarding my presence. So they weren't gonna burst into my room with a cake? I scroll through whatsapp idly, trying to act cool although my mind is racing through all the possibilities of what may or may not happen.

The Making of an Ambition

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The seven year old pursed her lips, eyebrows creased in deep thought. An Apsara pencil was held tight in her right hand. Craning her little neck, she tried to peek into her partner's notebook but found nothing useful. So once again she returned to her train of thought, tapping the freshly sharpened pencil on her chin. Their class teacher was moving from bench to bench, planting smiles in each of their faces.

Something stirred in her mind. "Teacher!", the little one thought suddenly, "I want to become a teacher!" Tightening her grip on the pencil, she neatly filled in the space in her notebook under the column titled 'My ambition'.

Tea or Coffee

Media.salon.com

“Tea or coffee?”

I turned to my sister out of habit. Any question directed at me was to be answered by her. I was the little one in the family who didn’t know the good from bad, or the better from good. But she always knew what to do.

The Vagabond

Source: Viewspaper

The engine roared to a start. The passengers were shuffling in their seats.

" I heard the roads are bumpy. " mumbled one to the other.

"Aye." came the reply, " Plenty o' curves 'n' heights. Best be prepared eh?" he said,
popping his pill. His neighbor rummaged through his bag for mufflers. The biting wind shouldn't get the better of him now should it?

The Race

 Source: brothersoft

Faster! Faster! the voices screamed. His lungs were ready to burst, his head throbbed as if a hammer was breaking through from within. Every inch of his body ached, yet he kept running. Faster! They bellowed still. He knew he couldn't go any faster than that. Or maybe he could, but he just didn't want to. What was the point after all? he thought. To trudge his way till the end where he'd win some badge like everybody else, a badge he didn't even want...

His train of thought was cut short by another who'd just overtaken him in the tracks. It was no more surprising to find people casually jog past him while he struggled to drag himself forward. You're not trying enough! the voices screamed into his ears again. There's still time. Work harder! He clenched his teeth as he tried to ignore his aching muscles, mustering the mettle despite the hurt. Not until yet another one had crossed him with ease did he notice that he had hardly been moving ahead. His efforts had been in vain. I can't. he spluttered, staggering to a halt.

Surprise !

Source: istockphoto

It was Christmas eve. All houses down the lane were studded with X'mas lights in their balconies. One couldn’t see many Christmas trees around here, Christians being scarce in the vicinity. In one of these homes were a little girl who found the absence of Christmas trees and Santa Clause deeply upsetting.

My Time Machine

 The wooden clock hung right overhead as I took off my shoes and placed my school bag aside. "What news today?" mom called from the kitchen. "Nothing new ma..." I said, "A few long lectures all day, and a huge pile of work to do." and I sat down for a snack. Once I felt refreshed enough to tackle the workload of the day, I entered my room.

A letter to Pak from Hindustan

Source : Google

Dear Pakistan,

It's been 69 long years. Can you imagine that? That long since people started calling us by different names.

Sisterhood

# Sisterhood

The fifth time over,
I'm oblivious however;
The phone alarm screams,
And she alone heeds.

A piano story

Source: joytunes

My turn was five minutes away. Clutching the sheet music in hand, I could feel my fingers trembling. Once again I tried to reassure myself. It was only an exam after all, why this tension?

What I cherish #CBF16

Dear diary,

Remember when we first met in 2010? Onam in school? The war of flowers?The white uniform smeared with petals?  The mess in the classroom followed by the principal's chiding? And our mission to clean up the mess... emptying our water bottles to the floor while scrubbing it with the day's leftover newspapers!

Richer than the Rich

"Why do you look upset dear?" the voice was heavy with concern. The little girl in rags looked up at the tall lady standing before her. She had tight jeans and a sleeveless tee on with a pair of sunglasses that matched with her outfit. A beaded bag with a slightly torn zipper hung over her shoulder. "What's the matter?" she asked again.

The little girl took a few steps back, clutching a poker in her hand. She couldn't understand why this strange lady was talking to her. "Do you need something fixed?" she asked the lady, shooting furtive glances behind her at the same time. It was only then that the lady noticed the few torn shoes and bags at her feet along with some repairing tools. Fumbling through her beaded bag, she dished out some cash and handed it out to her, only to find the little girl shaking her head. "Do you need something fixed?" she repeated, still with worried glances across the road.

The lady stared at this shabby kid who must be all of eight years old, living in the roadside, and refusing money. "Are you expecting someone?" she asked her, following her anxious glances. The girl looked suddenly frightened as her eyes darted back to the stranger.
"A-are you here to take me too??" she stammered. The lady found this reaction to be quite strange. She knelt down and touched her hand, "I'm here to help."

The girl sprang back in horror. No stranger had ever come close to her, much less touch her! "What do you want?" she cried, "Dada's missing! They took him! I know they did! I won't let you take me too!" The lady knew now that she needed help. "Who took your Dada?" she asked patiently, " We'll find him together." The little girl  only looked on with great suspicion.

Then, quite hesitantly, she began to speak up, "They came here the other day, telling us not to work anymore. They told us to beg instead. They said, that way, they'd make us rich!"

The lady was surprised to find a look of disgust on her face, "Don't you want to be rich?" she asked. The girl shook her head, "Never! I know how rich people are. Dada told me about them. They are cruel people. They like money more than their dadas, I would never be like them!"

"Did your Dada go with them then?" asked the lady. "No way! Dada would never beg! He refused, and they started fighting. Dada went away today morning and hasn't returned yet! They must have taken him!"

 The lady went closer to her, trying to reassure the lost soul. The sun was beginning to vanish, and she wished she had a pack of biscuits to give this girl - for she probably hadn't eaten all day. Just as she was contemplating to take the girl to the nearest shop, there was a quick, fierce movement behind her. And before she knew it, a young boy had yanked the little girl away from the woman. He looked barely sixteen, and was as shabbily dressed as the girl was.

"Dada!" squealed the little girl with a tone mixed with joy and relief. But the boy did not seem pleased. "I told you to stay away from such people didn't I?" he scolded. His sister was shaking her head, "No Dada. Don't worry. She isn't rich, she was very kind to me." The boy eyed the well-dressed, posh woman with some caution. His scrutiny was disturbed by a tug of his shirt, "Did they hit you Dada? What happened?!" He turned away from the intruder and gave the little girl a huge smile. "Nobody hit me Munni! Dada found a job! And soon you will go back to school!" Little Munni was jubilant as she leaped over to hug her brother.

The woman watched the celebration in silence, holding the few currency notes that had failed to soothe the little girl. Her own life hadn't treated her well, and she wished she could trade her money for someone who genuinely cared for her like Dada did his sister.

He'd noticed that the lady hadn't left. "Can I help you?" he asked. She felt guilty for not being the one asking the same to them.  Taking out the beaded bag with the torn zipper, she said "I need this fixed."  The boy nodded and took the bag.

As he set to work, his sister sat down next to him, smiling as if she was the happiest person on earth. The woman looked at her beaded bag that cost more than what the kids earned in a day. Yet, the smiles on their faces was something she was unable to buy for herself. She knew then, that they were truly richer than the rich.

Source: Deviantart.com

Linking with #MondayMusings

To Magic, with love

Source : kingofwallpapers

 ~When the time stood still~
  ~From the parallel world~

Dear Magic (or whatever it is that you call yourself),

 Like every other child I imagined and dreamed of meeting you one day. I fantasised about it for years; about that day when you would show up and make me someone special, maybe with the letter from Hogwarts or the cupboard to Narnia. I knew you would come to make my life extraordinary just like all the lovely books and movies had promised. I waited and waited for you to surprise me, for that day when I'd start moving things without touching them, when I could fly simply by spreading my arms, when I could make the world a pretty place full of flowers and happy people.

But as I grew up, I saw how everyone was certain you did not exist, that you lived only in stories like Santa Claus did, that you were simply impossible. Call it my immaturity or naivety or whatever, but I refused to believe them. Of course, they did not know about you because they were ordinary, because you just hadn't revealed yourself to them yet. But surely, I knew that you would come to me one day. While the others waited for their Prince Charming I waited for you. No matter how much the people claimed and 'proved' about your non existence, I was in denial.

So I waited and waited with the utmost patience, and yet you weren't showing up. Believe it or not, I even dared to doubt your existence at times! I do feel a bit guilty about that, for I knew that the moment I stopped believing in you, you would never come to me at all. So I continued to wait as I grew. People didn't call me a child anymore, and I was beginning to feel cheated by you. Why was it that you were so stubborn in hiding from me? My hope dwindled with time, yet I held on. I couldn't have been wrong. It just couldn't be.

And in the end, you did reveal yourself. You did surprise me, but you made me bang my head for being so silly! Because you were always right here with me! I was so busy 'waiting' for you to show up that I hadn't even bothered to 'look' for you on my own! I found you yes, only to realize that you weren't what I thought you were.

When I close my eyes, I see you. When I close my eyes I dream, disappear and fly. I explore your world and discover myself. All along, I was waiting for you to show up in the 'muggle' world, how silly of me!  And now back in the world of the ordinary, I know when I meet others who've met you too. They have a special glow,  a vibe, a uniqueness. It is because they have magic in them- yes they have you. There is no single word that would describe what they have. Was it passion, or illumination? Talent? Intuition? Nay, it was more. I prefer to call it by your name.

I do sometimes wish that you existed in the normal world too. I could then fly in the open sky, go invisible to observe the world unnoted, travel back in time to study ancient times. But that might muddle things up and leave the world in a frenzy. It is just as well that you exist within us, hidden from the naked eye.

Life has been interesting since I found you. I would've loved to tell everybody else about you, to convince them that they could find you too if they wished. But I'm afraid they might mistake me for a schizophrenic and shove the thought off. It is best when they figure it out on their own.

As for you, I'm sure there are many out there who believe in you too.  Do give them a nudge before they give up on you. And thank you for not letting me down. You've showed me that everything is not what it seems. You've showed me that it isn't the world around that has the magic, but it will seem so if we ourselves have a touch of magic.

And dear, you've showed me that you are not about the fairies or wands or the spells. You are our perception that can see the extra-ordinariness in the ordinary that the others fail to see.

I'm glad to have been faithful to you, and I believe we still have many an adventure ahead of us. Looking forward to all that there is yet to come. Until the next time, I stay here bewitched.

Yours enchanted-ly,
~A Wandering Mind~

Inspired from the #FridayReflections prompt 'Imagine you have a touch of magic, and can make impossible things happen. What would you do?'
Also linking with Finish the Sentence Friday on the prompt -  “When I close my eyes, I see…”

I Too Have A Blog Story

Beside a nicely furnished wall embellished with widgets of varying kinds sat a young girl who was considerably proud of it. She would be of course, since it was her own creation. The dash of yellow and brown all over wasn't exactly her plan, but it somehow ended up that way and she liked it too. One would think she had a special taste for shades of brown, but she loved violet and purple more. Unfortunately, those colours did not go quite well with the design.

In this self-crafted wall of hers, she had begun exploring herself, letting her mind wander to discover wonders she couldn't have fathomed otherwise. And each time she reached such a trance, the only word that escaped her lips was.... wow!

And so up above on her wall, was its crown yielding the words, 'Wandering Wows'. People usually called it her 'blog', but she preferred to call it her home. Over the months, she watched strangers come and peek in. Some days nobody came. At other days dozens showed up. A very tiny fraction of them were so kind as to tell her how much they liked her 'home', and she couldn't have been happier. But then it was so rare that it almost seemed unreal. She didn't know what was wrong...

Until one fine day, she was directed from the central library of Google to a city called IndiBlogger. In no time she was furnished an identity card for her IndiBlogger citizenship. Feeling immensely elated and slightly proud, she stepped foot in this so called blogger city, and was she spellbound! For before her were hundreds of thousands of walls like hers, only much bigger, and much much prettier!

 Excited as she was, she rushed over to the first wall before her. But she came out soon enough disappointed, for that wall told her things she did not care to know. So she tried the next one, and the next, and the next. But none simply matched her genre or likes. She knew she had to visit other people's walls. Google had told her to, else she wouldn't grow. And she wanted to grow. But soon enough she'd figured out exactly what to do.

Standing at one end of a long row of walls, shoe laces and hair taut, she was ready. In one swift jog across the street, her plan was to call out to every blogger on the way that she loved their blog and ask them to please visit hers. She would then fling her card with her address at each stop, hoping they'd pay a visit. Them bloggers shall be happy for the compliment, and she wouldn't have to read any of the walls she did not like.

And so the next day she sat beside her home again and waited. Maybe a couple more people did stop by that day, but she couldn't tell. Perhaps the people out there weren't kind enough to visit? But she wasn't one to give up, and so once again she jogged her way across a different street.

She ran an extra mile this time, and stumbled upon a wall she felt unusually attracted to. It wasn't a part of the plan, but she paused her jog and sat down. She read through the whole wall, and for the first time wasn't bored. It was her first, it was special, and surprisingly she wanted more. Along the side bar was a door to the 'Archives', and that was where she spent the rest of the day.

The next day she returned to the same wall and read some more, forgetting for a while about wanting to lure people to her own space. She'd noticed the hundreds that came to this wall everyday, some of whom constantly exchanged brilliant ideas. But she was too shy to speak. She followed the familiar faces to their own walls instead, and found herself engrossed in them too.

With time, as she explored new cities and streets, she marveled at the immensity of what they called the 'Blogosphere'. All this time she hadn't known the multitude of what she was now a part of. All that she knew was that nobody even knew she existed.

Whilst she remained a nobody, she learned. She learnt that the continent of Social Networks had a flourishing trade with the Blogoshpere, and so she began her own business from the centres in Twitter and Facebook. She learnt that the Blogosphere had intriguing activities at different places, so she made her presence in them hoping to make some friends. She learnt that she was still a novice awed by the amazing bloggers out there constantly proving their talents, and she vowed to try her best to be like them one day.

And as she learned, she had her wow moments now and then. Like when the visitor count shot up from ten to a hundred. Like when some veteran bloggers she hugely admired dropped by. Like when some people began exchanging ideas with her too. And like when some remembered her enough to return for more. She'd realized that she had evolved from a 'nobody' to a 'somebody'. It wasn't very great she knew, but at least it was a start.

 At present, this 'somebody' girl with a wandering mind had the courage to carry on. She knew that no matter what happened in her 'real' world, she would always have this home in the Blogosphere to return to.

Because by now, a part of her soul was within Wandering Wows, perhaps her first horcrux. And with that she could wander along with the whispers of her vagabond mind, until the very end.

                                                              

Perks of having a Gorgeous Bestie

Source: pinterest

Evening time. Intolerable heat. A hefty middle aged man paced up and down before an exhausted classroom. It was five minutes to bell. Must he continue? Or take a much needed break himself? His eyes darted from the all-time-conscious first-benchers to the sleepy heads at the rear. Heaving a sigh, he decided to make use of the last few minutes. Bad choice.

The class moaned in unison when he raised his voice. And as if in answer to their moans, the bell rang early. He made no effort to hide his relief as he left the boiling classroom. I perched myself on the desk, facing the boys row.
"So is it true?" I asked the one before me.
"I only told you what he told me. Make of it what you wish." he replied.
My eyes shifted to the row farther away. The guy in black was gesturing to me to meet him outside.
"See? I'm leaving anyway. Tell me what happens later." the boy in front of me picked his bag up and left.

I went out myself and bumped into a gang of boys. Oh not just any gang, the gang. The back-benchers gang with wierdo hairstyles. The gang that never missed a day in meeting up with me. Or to be precise, never missed a day in asking me about her.
"Two hundred and something" said the smaller one among them.
"What?" I said blankly.
"That's gonna be my rank for the entrance."
"Oh?"
"I'll get into Medical College."
I still wasn't sure where this was going, "You mean you'll study hard. "
He ignored my remark. "In five years, " he continued, "I'll be a doctor...and by then she'll be an engineer right?" he was now looking at me.
I stared right back at him, amused. One week of classes, with not even a hello to her, and he had their future planned? Gosh, guys can be so crazy.

The middle aged professor intervened, so the little guy had to leave his story unfinished. When stepping away, someone tapped my shoulder. I turned to face another classmate. "Let's go to the mall, its the weekend." he said. His intentions obvious well without his next line, "Take her along. And uh, the others too if you want."

"We'll see." I replied politely, stepping away again, and looking for that someone who summoned me out.
"Psst." There he was round the corner, the boy in black from the other row. He approached me, looking all nervous.
"So did you tell her yet? Do you think she'll like me?" his eyes were so full of hope. I bit my lip, wondering how to tell him that she wasn't looking for anyone right now. Ah well, a small lie wouldn't harm now would it?
"I'm sorry." I said with the humblest expression possible, "But she's taken."
That was the easiest way.  And before he could ask who that 'lucky' guy was, I walked away.

So much for having a pretty bestie! First the guy who likes your friend befriends you, and then all his other friends come and tell you why he befriended you. Eventually the beans are spilt and you're expected to play the wingman. You instead become only a sincere messenger. Never mind the outcome, for in the long run you end up with plenty of fun time and a whole new set of friends. Lost in thought, I rejoined my girl gang, only to find all of them staring at me.

"How?!" exclaimed one of them, "Just how?!"
"How what?"
"How are you close with everybody in here? It's only been a week!"
I grinned, turning to her. She stood there in all the elegance and gorgeousness of her demeanor, but with the same simple confused look as any other in our group. Pointing at my dear old friend, I said  "She is the secret."

.

This post is linked up with #MondayMusings at EverydayGyaan